Post by 23skidoo on Apr 21, 2008 11:16:06 GMT -5
From one great institution to another, I found myself at Nichols Mall, preparing again to rebuff the ravenous hordes. Whilst perusing the usual retail outlets that one is used to seeing in the Malls of Malton, I stumbled across something quite different. The Kilt Store - a shop that sells skirts for women and men.
Being an open minded sort of guy I investigated further and discovered that in a country far away from San Diego, called Scotland, the men and women paint their faces in woad, refuse to wear under garments and swathe themselves in brightly coloured wraps made of heavy wool called Kilts!
The salesman, Dick Mizgala, sized me up for a cheeky purple number as the Kilt Store Owner told me a little about the operation. It seemed pretty slick and egalitarian and I had to admit I was impressed, both with the outfit and the Kilt. I finally understood what Mel Gibson was on about when he shouted 'Freedom!'. My balls were swinging in the wind and I couldn't be happier.
Later that day I was exposed to an altogether different side of these retail warriors. The cades, after much battering, finally came down and the hordes swarmed in. As usual there was much panicking and shooting of guns. But amidst the chaos came a colourful layer of order as the Kilt Store Owner and his Employees formed a line between the advancing horde and the fleeing citizens. I could see Zimon in the centre of the line, flanked by, amongst others, Wasabee and Goolina.
I was confused, they had no weapons, both hands were busy grabbing the bottom of their kilts. Then, at an unspoken command, the whole company hoisted their kilts above their heads and gave the dead an explicit view of what being a survivor is all about. I was in awe, the zombies were in a rout, crying, covering their eyes, reaching for their shriveled manbagz.
It wasn't enough to save the mall, but gave a lot of people time to get out that would otherwise have fallen.
I've seen a few hero's in this town, but never standing in line with skirts on. So raise a glass to Nichols Mall and the brave men and women of The Kilt Store.
ps - Goolina, I managed to avert my eyes from your particular show. I just thought you'd like to know theres still some decency in this decrepit town.
Being an open minded sort of guy I investigated further and discovered that in a country far away from San Diego, called Scotland, the men and women paint their faces in woad, refuse to wear under garments and swathe themselves in brightly coloured wraps made of heavy wool called Kilts!
The salesman, Dick Mizgala, sized me up for a cheeky purple number as the Kilt Store Owner told me a little about the operation. It seemed pretty slick and egalitarian and I had to admit I was impressed, both with the outfit and the Kilt. I finally understood what Mel Gibson was on about when he shouted 'Freedom!'. My balls were swinging in the wind and I couldn't be happier.
Later that day I was exposed to an altogether different side of these retail warriors. The cades, after much battering, finally came down and the hordes swarmed in. As usual there was much panicking and shooting of guns. But amidst the chaos came a colourful layer of order as the Kilt Store Owner and his Employees formed a line between the advancing horde and the fleeing citizens. I could see Zimon in the centre of the line, flanked by, amongst others, Wasabee and Goolina.
I was confused, they had no weapons, both hands were busy grabbing the bottom of their kilts. Then, at an unspoken command, the whole company hoisted their kilts above their heads and gave the dead an explicit view of what being a survivor is all about. I was in awe, the zombies were in a rout, crying, covering their eyes, reaching for their shriveled manbagz.
It wasn't enough to save the mall, but gave a lot of people time to get out that would otherwise have fallen.
I've seen a few hero's in this town, but never standing in line with skirts on. So raise a glass to Nichols Mall and the brave men and women of The Kilt Store.
ps - Goolina, I managed to avert my eyes from your particular show. I just thought you'd like to know theres still some decency in this decrepit town.