Post by 23skidoo on Oct 6, 2008 15:46:41 GMT -5
Ed told me two things that I bothered to remember during my interview. Never shit a shitter and never fluff a fluffer. Until recently I'd done neither, but now I've got a confession to make....
The ferrets were fake, even the Uber Ferret. I made em up. I got drunk, I got laid, I got lazy. The news desk was carping on about a lack of decent stories and a shrinking tolerance for unprofessional behavior. I panicked and faked the ferret tales and for that I am sorry.
But the news now is as real as the scotch in rons belly. Big things are afoot, changes are brewing and most importantly, The Conch Has Been Sounded!!
Where we floundered and wandered we now stride in manly and purposeful directions!
Where we dwindled and shrank like the cold water on the male genitals our ranks now rise and swell with fresh blood and talent!
This is the New News Team, much like the old Team only this time we have the Ron Burgundy Memorial Lounge to fall back to. Where we go from hear only Odin knows, but I can feel his boozy breath pushing us onward to new glories and big stories!
For now the fight is in Scarletwood, we stand shoulder to shoulder with the Angels and the Garniss Border Patrol, in savage conditions against the mighty Militant Order of Barhah. And we're smacking them right in the keeshter!
So if the news has got you riled, if your pants are getting tight, then ask not what the News Team can do for You, but what YOU can do for the News Team!
The ferrets were fake, even the Uber Ferret. I made em up. I got drunk, I got laid, I got lazy. The news desk was carping on about a lack of decent stories and a shrinking tolerance for unprofessional behavior. I panicked and faked the ferret tales and for that I am sorry.
But the news now is as real as the scotch in rons belly. Big things are afoot, changes are brewing and most importantly, The Conch Has Been Sounded!!
Where we floundered and wandered we now stride in manly and purposeful directions!
Where we dwindled and shrank like the cold water on the male genitals our ranks now rise and swell with fresh blood and talent!
This is the New News Team, much like the old Team only this time we have the Ron Burgundy Memorial Lounge to fall back to. Where we go from hear only Odin knows, but I can feel his boozy breath pushing us onward to new glories and big stories!
For now the fight is in Scarletwood, we stand shoulder to shoulder with the Angels and the Garniss Border Patrol, in savage conditions against the mighty Militant Order of Barhah. And we're smacking them right in the keeshter!
So if the news has got you riled, if your pants are getting tight, then ask not what the News Team can do for You, but what YOU can do for the News Team!