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Post by Lachryma on Mar 13, 2007 21:34:09 GMT -5
Okay, I was talking to this random person on the wiki, and out of the blue they asked me "What exactly Is The problem between C4NT and Wes Mantooth?" ProofI then proceeded to laugh in his face, cuz I'm evil like that. Anyway, I thought y'all would be interested in that. |
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Post by Prisonner Of Today on Mar 18, 2007 22:25:56 GMT -5
I just ate a whole bag of saurkraut mix.
Now everyone follow the damned link.
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Post by Ron Burgundy on Mar 18, 2007 23:19:00 GMT -5
Well, you see, it all started back in the 1920s, when the government clamped down on the sale of alcohol. Granpappy Burgundy was mighty thirsty and every year, about this time, the speakeasies all ran dry. Well, Old Man Burgundy got pissed off and said he'd run to Mexico, see if he could come back holding a few bottles. The whole Channel 4 Radio Team was waiting back at home for Granpappy Burgundy's load.
So anyhow, he's driving hard and straight down twisty mountain roads, when he stops his Tin Lizzie and says, "Blazes! I've forgotten my coin purse and pocket watch back yonder in San Diego!" So what does a Radio man do in such a situation? Why, he loads gun and moseys down to the bank!
In walks our hero to this small bank in Acapulco and what does he discover but Grandpa Wes Mantooth and the whole Evening News Team are already holding the place up! Mantooth whirles around, Butch Cassidy like, and says, "Burgundy- you on a liquor run, too?"
"Sure as she born me." Grandpappy Burgundy liked to make obscure references.
Ignoring the allusion, Mantooth continued: "Well, I say we waste these hostages, drop some acid which I've conveniently brought back from the Future, and then hop in this here time machine and spend a few years touring with Pink Floyd."
"Acid?" Says Old Man Burgundy. "Is that... like... some sort of moonshine?" Well, needless to say, it wasn't. And that's why the 60s happened.
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Post by Lachryma on Mar 18, 2007 23:24:49 GMT -5
My God, it all makes sense now! The webs of coincidences and the intricacies of time travel all serve to explain the mysteries of the universe!
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Post by Prisonner Of Today on Mar 18, 2007 23:30:05 GMT -5
Heh, Ron, you aren't around much anymore, but when you are, it's gold, pure gold.
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Post by Ron Burgundy on Mar 18, 2007 23:30:57 GMT -5
Sorry about that, I've been working on college and after-college nonsense. I do want to be back around like I was, but the real world is a hassle. Perhaps sometime soon!  |
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Post by Prisonner Of Today on Mar 18, 2007 23:32:18 GMT -5
You know we can't hold it against you, what with the hair and the Arctic nuclear explosions.
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Post by Lachryma on Mar 18, 2007 23:32:50 GMT -5
You should put your brilliant story on the wiki, for ignorant people to read and enlighten themselves!
Too bad about real life, but hey, we can always have hope...
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Post by Prisonner Of Today on Mar 18, 2007 23:42:08 GMT -5
You should post it for that killjoy guy.
Yeah, who knows? Maybe someday we'll all manage to avoid any sort of crazy real life bullocks.
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Post by Wes Mantooth on Mar 19, 2007 21:51:01 GMT -5
Well Burgundy, that was an interesting story, but next time you get drunk off your ass, i suggest you stay away from a computer. You see ever since we were children we were rivals. Always competing, always fighting to be top dog. Well fortunately for him, mom always liked him best, so when ever i succeeded I was usually punished.
Well around High School he grew into his trademark glorious Chinbeard and it was all over from there. All he had to do was smile and the shladies practically messed themselves. The news team he joined flourished, and in no time were climbing the ratings.
I had the skill, but he had looks, appearantly that is all that matters to the people who rate the TV programs, then there is the fact that his superior ratings are flawed! They don't take into account houses that have more than one television.
So why do we hate each other so? Everything from sibling rivalry to flawed ratings systems... but i do promise that one of these days, the Channel 9 Evening News Team will be on top, while all of Channel 4 is shambling around Malton, smelling of rot and sex panther.
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Post by Lachryma on Mar 20, 2007 2:36:43 GMT -5
Hmm...should we flip a coin to see which story is correct?
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Post by Prisonner Of Today on Mar 21, 2007 0:35:19 GMT -5
You mean you'd take the second best reporter in Malton's word over the firsts? For shame...
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Post by Lachryma on Mar 21, 2007 0:41:01 GMT -5
Well, uh...They are both very plausible. Indeed, they could both be true!
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Post by Prisonner Of Today on Mar 21, 2007 0:54:56 GMT -5
Now THAT would blow my mind.
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Post by Lachryma on Mar 21, 2007 1:11:15 GMT -5
What? They could both be true. How could they not be?
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