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Post by Noah on Jan 25, 2010 18:07:04 GMT -5
Where'd you get that statement, at the... toilet... store? Where'd you find that comeback, at the ... stupid ... factory? |
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Post by Marcel Swann on Jan 26, 2010 7:32:02 GMT -5
You guys think you're funny? Well, I've got news for you, Einstein.....you're not.
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Post by asshole doctor™ on Jan 26, 2010 7:33:41 GMT -5
god these new guys really are stinking up mah thread.
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Post by Argo on Jan 26, 2010 11:35:19 GMT -5
god these new guys really are stinking up mah thread. For those who have been here for less time than even me, I'll translate as many people cannot speak proctologist-ese. This is what the ol' doc is saying:  |
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Post by Noah on Jan 26, 2010 19:32:48 GMT -5
You guys think you're funny? Well, I've got news for you, Einstein.....you're not. That hurt man, that hurt deep. But hey, could you expect any less than that in here? |
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Post by winka on Jan 27, 2010 22:29:55 GMT -5
It aint for the money ,it aint for the glory ,lt.'s what we do…  |
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Post by Argo on Jan 28, 2010 11:30:24 GMT -5
Get stinkin' drunk and ruin a place after we fix it?
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Post by winka on Jan 28, 2010 13:02:25 GMT -5
Who wants to go in with me on a fixer-uper?
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Post by winka on Jan 28, 2010 13:04:28 GMT -5
Maybe we can slap on a new coat of paint and flip it for a quick buck.
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Post by Noah on Jan 28, 2010 19:08:14 GMT -5
I don't think Malton's exactly the most booming market.
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Post by Marcel Swann on Jan 28, 2010 22:04:41 GMT -5
Noah, you gotta buy low and sell high if you're going to make money. See, most people do it the other way around, and that's why they're crying in their beer. It takes some guts to buy when others are selling and sell when others are buying. But that's how ya gotta do it.
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Post by Noah on Jan 29, 2010 21:02:51 GMT -5
Oh, it's nothing about the real estate market, it's just the neighborhood isn't exactly what I'd call great. I've never been a fan of having to lock my doors at night, and then pile up the furniture against it, and then sleep with my shotgun in the nook of my arm. Plus it's just too damned hard to find the deeds to these shit holes, I mean, charming little cottages.
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Post by Marcel Swann on Jan 29, 2010 22:54:47 GMT -5
I've never been a fan of having to lock my doors at night, and then pile up the furniture against it, and then sleep with my shotgun in the nook of my arm. Wha? I thought that was your favorite way to sleep. The only thing missing is the bottle of Jack Daniels in the nook of your other arm. |
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Post by Argo on Jan 30, 2010 15:50:28 GMT -5
That goes unspoken. There's always a bottle of JD in the nook in either of his arms, whether he's running in the streets of Ridleybank or passed-out drunk in the food court of Caiger Mall.
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Post by Noah on Feb 1, 2010 12:00:57 GMT -5
Ol' Jack's been there for me in the best of times and the worst of times. It reminds me of a story...
One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with Jack Daniels.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.
So I said to Jack Daniels,
"You promised me Jack,
that if I drank you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"
Jack Daniels replied,
"You're so goddamned drunk you can't see straight, much less count footprints. Now quit having some drunken vision and have another shot instead."
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