Post by Mitch All Together on Apr 9, 2008 14:43:07 GMT -5
Okay, so I was shelving in the Philosophy section, and I had this thought. Well... the thought was, like, couched in an acid flashback, but when the Goddess Kali handed me a Big Mac and told me I was the One True Spartacus, I realized what it was she was saying, and that I needed to stop cracking my back on the shelving cart because it keeps reactivating the drugs in my spinal fluid, man.
So, like... what's stopping us from running a library as zombies, man?
Think about it, man. Randy is always a zombie, and he helps out. I've seen lots of zombies pitch in over the years, man. We seem to have a big red bullseye on our collective ass, so we wake up dead more often than not. That's fine, that's cool, that's how the game goes, but it keeps messing with our, like... you know. Universe.
So... what if most of us just agreed to stay dead for a while? Some of us would stay alive, man, and talk and spraypaint and stuff, but the rest of us could just hang out and be cool and be dead. Anyone who wants a revive can Mrh? for one, but for the most part, we just... you know, do what we normally do, but dead.
The downside of this is that we can't talk as well, man, but that's temporary; like I said, we can get revives and stuff, man. But the upside is that if there's a bunch of us in there dead, man, then when other zombies show up and start... you know, like, gnawing on the living ones, we can all totally gang up on them. Because, like, what are they gonna do? Kill us? We'd just stand up again, and we're not going anywhere because we're already, like, at home, man. We could protect ourselves without worrying about the barricades falling, running out of ammo, using FAKs, or being, like, targeted. Because who's dumb enough to target zombies?
In closing, I'd like to say that if Papa Smurf is truly the father of all of the Smurfs, then he's the one who named all of the other Smurfs, and was thus the architect of their very destinies -- for I submit to you that a Smurf's name is his calling, and Jokey Smurf could no less be a prankster than Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster could fail to be a warrior. Also, man, I think this is a way for us to, like, adapt to the goddamn Dead, and maybe survive a little longer in this crazy world of ours.
So... this is where you guys tell me to get back to shelving.
So, like... what's stopping us from running a library as zombies, man?
Think about it, man. Randy is always a zombie, and he helps out. I've seen lots of zombies pitch in over the years, man. We seem to have a big red bullseye on our collective ass, so we wake up dead more often than not. That's fine, that's cool, that's how the game goes, but it keeps messing with our, like... you know. Universe.
So... what if most of us just agreed to stay dead for a while? Some of us would stay alive, man, and talk and spraypaint and stuff, but the rest of us could just hang out and be cool and be dead. Anyone who wants a revive can Mrh? for one, but for the most part, we just... you know, do what we normally do, but dead.
The downside of this is that we can't talk as well, man, but that's temporary; like I said, we can get revives and stuff, man. But the upside is that if there's a bunch of us in there dead, man, then when other zombies show up and start... you know, like, gnawing on the living ones, we can all totally gang up on them. Because, like, what are they gonna do? Kill us? We'd just stand up again, and we're not going anywhere because we're already, like, at home, man. We could protect ourselves without worrying about the barricades falling, running out of ammo, using FAKs, or being, like, targeted. Because who's dumb enough to target zombies?
In closing, I'd like to say that if Papa Smurf is truly the father of all of the Smurfs, then he's the one who named all of the other Smurfs, and was thus the architect of their very destinies -- for I submit to you that a Smurf's name is his calling, and Jokey Smurf could no less be a prankster than Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster could fail to be a warrior. Also, man, I think this is a way for us to, like, adapt to the goddamn Dead, and maybe survive a little longer in this crazy world of ours.
So... this is where you guys tell me to get back to shelving.
