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Post by Magatsu Taito on Nov 3, 2007 16:45:00 GMT -5
Too many choices... I wanna see everything, simultaneously! Or maybe one after the other...
And remember... Feel no fear, with Ranger Beer!
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Post by Ron Burgundy on Nov 3, 2007 23:50:29 GMT -5
I really like this. Do you mind if I stick it on my wiki page in the "quotes" section? I hope not, because it's too good to wait for your reply! XD
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Post by Codename T on Nov 5, 2007 7:53:28 GMT -5
Indeed, the Burgundy stuff made me laugh and hearken back to a time where people believed everything they saw on TV. ;D
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Post by Tovarisch Khrushchev on Nov 5, 2007 18:43:05 GMT -5
I choose.....4!
Of course I'd choose 4.
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Post by 23skidoo on Nov 6, 2007 7:54:32 GMT -5
Ranger Danger!
When I think of beauty I think of 3 things.
1. Ron working the room with a bottle of scotch in his hand 2. A Bottle of scotch working the room with me in its hand 3. Dr Kildare cleaning one of my glorious flesh wounds with a bottle of scotch.
And until yesterday that was enough for me, that was before I saw the Malton Rangers in action. I entered the Showers NT in Scarletwood and there they were, good men, strong men. Men like us, only not quite so well groomed. I said hello, we'd met before, and settled down. It had been a long day and I was exhausted. All I wanted was a little down time and some quiet company. What I got was a door and two windows crashing inward and a gaggle of the dead pouring into the room. I groaned, they groaned, and started to rise. A steady hand landed on my shoulder and the steely voice of Jleggit said 'We got this'. Good god they were flawless, the embodiment of 'Do Easy'. I thought at first that I was watching this on the screen, something didn't quite make sense. Then I realised - these bastards were fighting in slow motion!. At Channel 4 we brawl, and we sing, and we dance and we drink and give thanks to Odin for our knuckles and our knees. Whatever god these Rangers pray too has imbued them with unearthly skills, almost too beautiful to be considered violence. But violence it was, and in all too short a time the zombies were dispatched and the building was secure. After it was over Magatsu looked at me and said 'Did you get that?'. To my shame the camera still had its lens cap on. Wulfgar just smiled and told me there would be other times.
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Post by Codename T on Nov 6, 2007 10:14:48 GMT -5
I have seen the Rangers fight many battles, and have even joined their ranks for a time, and I can attest to this. The Rangers are the avatars of swift efficient killing, just as the News Team is the avatar of a drunken brawl in all of its violence and its glory. I'm proud to be an amalgamation of the two. ;D
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Post by jleggitt on Nov 6, 2007 11:01:06 GMT -5
23 I think this is one of the best descriptions of the rangers I have ever heard. Would it be ok with you if I put it on our wiki page.
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Post by Lord Wulfgar on Nov 6, 2007 12:34:40 GMT -5
23skidoo that was wonderful, told with the true C4NT flare to it.
Jleggitt if he doesn't mind you should totally put it on the wiki.
You could call it something like "The glory of the Rangers as witnessed by C4NT anchorman"
Or something like that.
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Post by 23skidoo on Nov 6, 2007 14:14:52 GMT -5
Thank you Wulfgar, but do not call me anchorman, for there can be only one. I'm just the lemon next to Burgundy's pie. Channel 4 Correspondant will do nicely.
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Post by Ron Burgundy on Nov 6, 2007 21:43:52 GMT -5
A correspondent who is in correspondence with the very souls of the Rangers and Channel 4 News Team!
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Post by Tovarisch Khrushchev on Nov 6, 2007 22:33:19 GMT -5
The minister here is the only reporter we still have alive. Thats why we keep him so busy. While we're here enjoying our central heating and scotch he's out there getting the tough stories and fighting bears...with his fists!
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Post by 23skidoo on Nov 7, 2007 3:10:17 GMT -5
Thats not what Ed told me when he sent me out into the wild....he said the heating was broke and wouldn't be back on for a month!
No matter, I'm glad our communication network's improving and feeds are comming in from other members of the team.
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Post by Codename T on Nov 7, 2007 18:08:00 GMT -5
Ed isn't really in the know. We party all we want, despite what he says! Because he puts Garth in charge of keeping us from partying too hard, and, well, we don't really listen to Garth. ;D
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Post by 23skidoo on Nov 13, 2007 8:57:04 GMT -5
Burgundy is Back!
When I first met Ron I asked him, 'What is it that makes a man classy?'
Ron sat down and looked at me in a fatherly sort of way (and with my mother, it's possible!) and said,
' A classy man knows when to throw a party and when to throw a punch, it's as simple as that.'
I've kept that with me ever since. And now that he has returned, what does it mean for the living and dead of Malton? It means that you'd better polish your shoes, comb your hair and hold your women tight, because a classier man than you has just re-entered the fight.
Sleep tight viewers and until next time, keep surviving!
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Post by Codename T on Nov 15, 2007 10:05:41 GMT -5
Ron Burgundy is all our fathers. Incidentally, Ron Burgundy is also the one who de-virginized every single one of us. Yes, even you over there in the corner.
It is widely believed that Burgundy went back in time and conceived himself and that right after his birth, he downed a glass of scotch, had some ribs for lunch, and quickly bedded the closest nurse.
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